So much in life is fleeting. Things come and go, people come and go, thoughts come and go. There is an ebb and flow to life that our humaness likes to fight with. We struggle causing ourselves a lot of suffering and emotional pain.
I recently listened to a group call from Deepak Chopra and Eckart Tolle entitled “Beautiful Chaos”. I was drawn to participate in the call because of the word “chaos”. It’s a word that I’ve used quite a bit when describing my life.
There was one concept that struck me and has floated around my head since I listened to the call. I thought that pain and suffering were one and the same. I never differentiated the two. But seeing how they are different, yet two sides of the same coin, has opened my awareness to the idea that suffering can be a place of expansion. Both are places of learning.
Deepak says pain is physiological and biological. It is necessary for learning on a physical level for protection. I bet you were more careful around the stove after you burned yourself when you were little.
He says that suffering is in the mind. It’s a mental experience. It occurs because we don’t understand reality, the what is. Our minds take over interpretation and perspective for us. It’s where the stories about what is are created.
What I’ve come to discover is that when we can accept what is, suffering dissipates. Acceptance is the ability to look at a situation and see the facts separate from the story we tell ourselves. It’s seeing fact versus fiction.
I believe one of the most challenging things to accept is our wholeness. The fact that we are everything you could think of is a difficult idea to grasp. We don’t want to be the bad guy, the ugly girl, the asshole, or any other negative quality. We’re conditioned to believe that it’s not ok to be these things. This is where the suffering, emotional pain and turmoil begin.
When we aren’t in acceptance of the idea of wholeness the “Beach Ball Effect” occurs. This is the idea that what keeps getting shoved under is eventually going to pop up, and it’s usually going to pop up when we least expect it, and at the most inopportune times. This pattern repeats itself until we learn to stop shoving things down, when we learn to accept our wholeness.
Those things that we are usually shoving under the water are our disowned qualities and shadows. These are the things we don’t like about ourselves and are trying to hide from others. These shadow beliefs are born out of fear and breed insecurity. They tell us that we aren’t living up to the expectations of others. So we start to hide our true selves. We start to deny who we really are. We put up a facade so people will love and accept us. We may become needy, people pleasers or overachievers. We get so busy trying to prove that we aren’t something that we begin to suffer.
So, whether it’s a situation or a quality within yourself, acceptance is the antidote to suffering. What do you need to accept today? What’s going to set you free from the perceived suffering you’re going through? I invite you to take a few minutes to sit in stillness and ask your Higher Self what you need to accept. Your answers are already within you, you just need to learn to listen.
With love and acceptance.
Are you ready to discover the parts of yourself that you’ve disowned?
Contact me to rediscover your wholeness so you can be the best version of yourself.