Still trying to balance life? Here’s what to do instead.

Still trying to balance life? Here’s what to do instead.

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Just like these stairs are pieces that get us somewhere, the things we do in life get us where we want to go. Figuring out how each piece fits into place helps us create ease, grace and flow {and who doesn’t want that?!?!}.

Each stair works harmoniously with the next to get us to our destination, right? That’s how each area of our life, and each of our 4 bodies {more on that in a minute}, work too. They say it’s the journey not the destination, so during the journey we need to make everything work in harmony.

There’s a totally different energy to harmony too. There’s a sense that the effort we’re putting in to what we’re doing will lead us to great rewards, and the greatest reward is a beautiful dance where everyone and everything is coordinated and aligned.  That sounds a hell of lot more fun than “balance” to me.

But how do we get there?

I’ve got 5 tips for you that will help you step off the fulcrum and start dancing your way to a fun and Fiercely Fresh Life.

Tip #1: Be grateful for the things in your life.

We’ve all heard about how an attitude of gratitude can change your life. It’s true. Sometimes though, it’s hard to be grateful for a full plate. My suggestion is to reframe how you look at that plate. There may be a lot there, and you GET to create and participate in life rather than HAVE to get shit done. Wayne Dyer said it best, “If you change the way you look at things, the things you look at change.” Boom! New lenses help us see more clearly.

Tip #2: Try on different routines

We all have routines for the things we do. Routines help us have some structure to our lives so we don’t have our heads in the clouds all the time. If a routine starts to get a little too mundane for you, switch things up a bit. I tried so hard to get up in the morning and get my workout done, then meditate, then get ready, then get the boys up, then…then…then…

I realized that I need to wake the hell up before doing much of anything so I’ve started getting up and moving around the house a bit {quietly of course, shhhhh, don’t wake the kids yet!!!!}. By allowing myself at least half an hour to actually wake up before jumping into my routine, I’ve been more motivated to keep that routine going. Boom! It’s all about flexibility.

Tip #3: Prioritize

Ahhhhh…the to-do list. You know the one that never seems to get shorter, only longer. We all have these too. There are only so many hours in the day so we need to figure out a way to get the important shit done {I fed the kids yesterday, do I really have to do it again today?}

Sit down with your list on a regular basis and connect with it. Take a look at the tasks that are on it and figure out what needs to be done now, what can wait until later, and what can you ask for help with {OMG!!! Did she just say ask for help?!?! Yes, yes I did. But that’s for another day and another blog post}. Make columns down the page and put each task into the appropriate column. Boom! Taking back your power.

Tip #4: Boundaries

Oh boy! Do you even know what boundaries are? I’ve posted about them on my FB page. You should check it out.

According to Websters Dictionary a boundary is something that indicates or fixes a limit or extent. There are other definitions that come about from the psychology arena, but this one, for me, is the simplest and easiest to understand. It’s pretty self-explanatory.

The thing is we have to set boundaries with ourselves as much as we do with others. I have set a general goal for myself to be more productive. In order to do that I had to set the boundary with myself that I would only play games on my phone for 30 minutes a day. I still found myself stepping over my own boundary and getting distracted, so I set an even clearer boundary and took all game apps off my phone.

When we set boundaries we’re acknowledging what’s ok with us and what’s not. If we allow those boundaries to be stepped over, we end up full of resentment, or worse yet, beating ourselves up. The thing is, we need to take a look at how we allowed the boundary to be stepped over in the first place. Were we trying to people please again? {Not that I ever did anything like that.} Were we distracting ourselves from something deeper?

Get clear on your boundaries, for yourself and others, and have the courage to enforce them. That courage is already within you, so go find it {If you need help, let me know. It’s what I do.}

Tip #5: Be mindful of all four of your bodies

Did you know you have three bodies other than your physical body? You have your spiritual body, your mental body, and your emotional body. All four bodies are connected, deeply. Starting with your spiritual body, any dis-ease runs down hill, meaning that when your physical body starts to shows disease, the ailment has been around for a while, it’s just now getting down to the bottom of the totem pole.

That’s how I was diagnosed with breast cancer. My spiritual, mental, and emotional bodies were so broken and battered. My poor physical body couldn’t keep everything afloat anymore. The lump I found was directly over my heart, the thing I was most disconnected from. My mental and emotional states were full of depression and anxiety. It’s because I didn’t have a belief system, other than gloom and doom.

I fought the cancer physically of course, and I also found ways to fight it with spiritual, mental, and emotional healing. I’m six and a half years cancer free and it’s because I treated the whole me.

When making decisions, tackling your to-do list, spending time with those you love, pretty much anything you do, be mindful of how it’s effecting your spiritual body, your mental body, your emotional body, and your physical body.

There you have it. Easy and effortless ways to get off the teeter totter and start dancing your way to harmony and YOUR Fiercely Fresh Life.

Need help putting these tips into practice?

Contact me today for your free Clarity Call.


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How to survive the holidays with your sanity intact, Part 3

How to survive the holidays with your sanity intact, Part 3

Welcome to Part 3 of the How To Survive The Holidays With Your Sanity Intact series.

Do you ever wonder how you’re going to get through the holidays without major stress?

Do you end up busting your butt to make everything perfect, just for things to fall apart?

You try so hard to buy the perfect gifts for everyone. In the hustle of the season you forgot about your cousin’s kids, and they’ve decided to come to the family dinner this year. It’s the day of the dinner, actually dinner will be served in just a couple of hours. What are you going to do now?!

Dinner is at your house this year. You’ve set up everything so beautifully. You’ve slaved in the kitchen all day making hor devours, the main course, and last minute side dishes. You’ve put the pies back in the oven to reheat them while everyone eats. While everyone is enjoying the gorgeous food you’ve prepared someone asks if something is burning. THE PIES!!!! What are you going to do now?

1st: take a deep breath, or 10.

2nd: laugh hysterically, even if you have to fake it. Eventually someone else will start laughing with you and your fake cry/laugh becomes totally authentic.

3rd: ask yourself some of the “right questions”

What are these “right questions”? Debbie Ford gives you ten in her book “The Right Questions: Ten Essential Questions to Guide You to an Extraordinary Life”.

Two of these questions I use ALL. THE. TIME.

“Am I looking for what’s right or am I looking for what’s wrong?”

As a former Negative Nelly I was always looking for what was wrong with the situation. When you look for what’s wrong, that’s usually what you’ll find. Start looking for what’s right. Instead of seeing the burnt pies see the possibility of family members coming together to cut out the burnt parts and throw the rest in a bowl with ice cream and call it cobbler.

“Am I standing in my power or am I trying to please another?”

As a former People Pleaser I was constantly striving for perfection because I had the silly thought that I had to have everything together so I was the star of the family. That only led me to being depressed and anxious, and broke because I was buying presents for everyone who was going to show up at my house, and of course I had to have extras just in case someone showed up unexpectedly.

Once I started asking myself some of the “right questions” I started to see my motivations and intentions more clearly. I was constantly giving my power to be happy over to others. My happy was already in me, not in the opinion of others. That, for me, was freedom from the little catastrophe’s in life. My life didn’t fall apart with every little bump anymore. These questions also helped me reframe my thinking so that I could enjoy what was going on rather than struggling to control it all.

If you’d like to learn more about the “right questions” sign up for my FREE 7-day Get Through The Holidays With Ease Challenge. I’ll be going over these questions, and more, in more detail, as well as some other tips I use to help me deal with my emotions in the moment so I can life a Fiercely Fresh Life. We start October 15th.

If you’d like to know more about the other tips I’ll be sharing check out Part 1 and Part 2 of my How To Survive The Holidays With Your Sanity Intact series.

If you know someone else who would like to get through the holidays sanely, please share these tips and the challenge with them.

Get Through The Holidays With Ease Challenge

Sign up for the FREE 7-day Get Through The Holidays With Ease Challenge.

In this challenge you’ll learn some of my best techniques to deal with your emotions in the moment so they don’t start causing chaos with those around you {or in your own head}.

Over the course of 7 days I’ll teach you some quick and easy tools to help you deal with those emotional upsets that end up ruining the holidays. I know these tools work, because I’ve gone from a woman full of anger, resentment and anxiety over the tiniest thing, to a Fiercely Fresh Bulldog who’s committed to giving up “perfection” and keeping my family close. My clients have used them with great success too!

These tips and tricks are portable so you can take them wherever you go this holiday season. You have NO excuses for NOT using them, AND they will allow you to have a Happy Holidays no matter what others are doing. Plus you can use them throughout the rest of the year to keep you balanced and happy.

By the end of the week, you’ll have some really awesome, simple, and powerful tools to help you deal with situations and emotions in the moment, so you don’t get sidetracked by what the outside world is doing.

Sign up today! We start October 15th.


Sign up now

How to survive the holidays with your sanity intact, Part 2

How to survive the holidays with your sanity intact, Part 2

Welcome to Part 2 of the How To Survive The Holidays With Your Sanity Intact series.

Are you excited about the holidays coming up? Or are you feeling a little stressed out by them?

Maybe you feel a little disconnected from the true meaning of the holidays. It’s really easy to do, especially since retail stores are setting up their Christmas decorations in September now. Hello!!! Summer wasn’t even over yet and I saw Santa and Christmas trees plastered all over the place.

It’s hard to feel connected to something that’s still a few months away but being shoved down your throat.

Today’s post is all about learning how to connect, and stay connected, to the spirit of the holidays, which can be taken with you throughout the rest of the year.

What’s this connection I’m talking about? It’s that inner guidance system that gives you all the answers you need. It’s that part of you that just “knows” what’s right for you. It’s inside you, not out on the store shelves.

Connecting to this spirit, your spirit, is essential to living a fulfilling life. It’s how we create the lives we say we want.

I’ve got three tips to harnessing the power of this connection:

  1. This goes along with my last post about being short tempered. Finding acceptance around a situation can help you breeze right through any yuck that may be there. To find acceptance all you need to do is separate out the facts about what’s going on and the story you’re telling yourself about it. For example, I was shopping in Costco the first or second week of September. Summer hadn’t yet turned to fall. I walk out from one aisle to see a Halloween display directly across the aisle from a Christmas display. I felt myself getting angry that it was so damn early and I was seeing Christmas stuff. This is a problem for me because I am trying to teach my kids about not buying into the idea that they need stuff to be happy and have fun. So, rather than let my anger get the best of me I stopped and took a picture and posted it on my Instagram feed. I separated the facts-I was staring at two store displays, from the story-this world is going to hell, we consume way too much, we produce way too much plastic, we can’t even get through summer without someone shoving consumerism down our throats (and you know the rabbit hole goes much deeper). I chose to make a little fun and light of what I was seeing. I posted the picture and moved on.
  2. When you come up against a definition of something that is based on society and you feel that sense of obligation to “keep up with the Jones’s come up, redefine that something to align with your Higher Self. This goes back to my example from above in that I can get all upset about not being able to get this stuff that society says I need to have a wonderful Christmas, or I can redefine what a wonderful Christmas means to me. You can do this with a single word too. I’ve redefined many words, which allows me to live my life on my terms.
  3. This little beauty will help you make decisions from that place of inner guidance. I call it Yum, Yuck, Oh Fuck. It’s adapted from Tom Robbins idea that there are only two mantras-yum and yuck. I added the Oh Fuck because anytime I feel the Oh Fuck I know it’s a big decision that can lead me to great success or have detrimental consequences. When making a decision think about the choices. Does choice #1 make you feel yummy or yucky? Does choice #2 make you feel yummy or yucky? Whichever one feels yummy, that’s the one you go with. It really is that simple, even with all the things you’re telling yourself “could” happen. If any of the choices make you go Oh Fuck, if it’s a good feeling that arises in your gut, go for it. If it’s that bad feeling that you just can’t ignore, run for the hills.

These tips will help you not only connect to your own spirit but that of others, which is what the holidays are really about anyway, right?

If you’d like to learn more sign up for my FREE 7-day Get Through The Holidays With Ease Challenge. I’ll be going over these tips in more detail as well as others. We start October 15th.

If you’d like to learn other tips for keeping your sanity during the holidays check out Part 1 of the How To Survive The Holidays With Your Sanity Intact series.

If you know someone else who would like to get through the holidays sanely, please share these tips and the challenge with them.

Get Through The Holidays With Ease Challenge

Sign up for the FREE 7-day Get Through The Holidays With Ease Challenge. 

In this challenge you’ll learn some of my best techniques to deal with your emotions in the moment so they don’t start causing chaos with those around you {or in your own head}.

Over the course of 7 days I’ll teach you some quick and easy tools to help you deal with those emotional upsets that end up ruining the holidays. I know these tools work, because I’ve gone from a woman full of anger, resentment and anxiety over the tiniest thing, to a Fiercely Fresh Bulldog who’s committed to giving up “perfection” and keeping my family close. My clients have used them with great success too!

These tips and tricks are portable so you can take them wherever you go this holiday season. You have NO excuses for NOT using them, AND they will allow you to have a Happy Holidays no matter what others are doing. Plus you can use them throughout the rest of the year to keep you balanced and happy.

By the end of the week, you’ll have some really awesome, simple, and powerful tools to help you deal with situations and emotions in the moment, so you don’t get sidetracked by what the outside world is doing.

Sign up today! We start October 15th.


Sign up now

How to survive the holidays with your sanity intact, Part 1

How to survive the holidays with your sanity intact, Part 1

Does your fuse seem to get a little shorter around the holidays? I know mine does. The holidays bring out the part of me that ends up spewing ugliness all over the place. That’s not good for the Christmas decorations or for the relationships in my life. Plus, I’m not able to survive the holidays very well.

The struggle to balance your ideas of what the holiday season is all about and what society tells us is important is very real. We strive to do the right things and make every one happy. Sometimes we lose sight of what makes us happy in this pursuit. We become short tempered when the balance is a little off.

Today’s blog is about finding ways to get that balance back, to harmonize what’s important to you and what’s important to others, quickly and easily.

Why is it important to harmonize the two? It’s important because you know you want to get through the holidays with your sanity intact, and because keeping what’s important to others in mind helps us build stronger, more connected relationships with those we love. That’s a win-win for everyone.

Here are my three tips for extinguishing that fuse before there’s an explosion:

  1. STOP: When you feel yourself getting angry, upset, or off balance literally stop what you’re doing, take a deep breath, observe what’s really going on, then make a conscious choice about how you want to proceed. When used regularly this trick can shift the entire situation and put out the bomb that’s about to hit.
  2. Recap: At night just before you lay down to sleep think about all the positive things that happened throughout the day. Take just a few minutes to replay the events of your day like a movie on the screen of your mind. I’m sure you’ll find at least three things to be grateful for with this exercise too.
  3. Accept, surrender and forgive: Looking at a situation and being able to discern between the facts of what’s going on and the story you’re telling yourself about it will allow you to find acceptance of the situation. You can then decide what action needs to be taken next. Can you let it go or does something need to be done? Either way finding acceptance will allow you to surrender to the situation instead of getting upset about not being able to control it. You can then forgive yourself for losing your temper and the other person for any perceived wrongdoing. Remember, forgiveness isn’t about condoning the actions of another, it’s about detaching from them.

These are three of my tips to use when dealing with the hustle and bustle of the holidays. You can use these when you’re out shopping in the chaos that is the retail world or in when you’re at the family get-together. They’ll help you defuse the bomb before a mess is made. You’ll avoid the whole damage control thing.

If you’d like to know more about these, and the other tips I have for dealing with your emotions during the holidays sign up for my FREE 7-day Get Through The Holidays With Ease Challenge. We start October 15th.

If you know someone else who would like to get through the holidays sanely, please share these tips and the challenge with them.

Get Through The Holidays With Ease Challenge

Sign up for the FREE 7-day Get Through The Holidays With Ease Challenge.

In this challenge you’ll learn some of my best techniques to deal with your emotions in the moment so they don’t start causing chaos with those around you {or in your own head}.

Over the course of 7 days I’ll teach you some quick and easy tools to help you deal with those emotional upsets that end up ruining the holidays. I know these tools work, because I’ve gone from a woman full of anger, resentment and anxiety over the tiniest thing, to a Fiercely Fresh Bulldog who’s committed to giving up “perfection” and keeping my family close. My clients have used them with great success too!

These tips and tricks are portable so you can take them wherever you go this holiday season. You have NO excuses for NOT using them, AND they will allow you to have a Happy Holidays no matter what others are doing. Plus you can use them throughout the rest of the year to keep you balanced and happy.

By the end of the week, you’ll have some really awesome, simple, and powerful tools to help you deal with situations and emotions in the moment, so you don’t get sidetracked by what the outside world is doing.

Sign up today! We start October 15th.


Sign up now

Cause or effect. Which one are you?

Cause or effect. Either way, whether we want to believe it or not, we are at cause for everything in our lives. The good AND the bad.

In this video I share the equation that will help you see the results you want, the excuses you use that keep you stuck, and give you the opportunity to consciously choose which one you want to follow.

Be the alligator!

Now that you know the equation and have written down your excuses, refer to them every day. Keep them handy so you can refer to them often. When you know which excuse you’re using, it’s much easier to shift to a more positive action. Action is the only way you’re going to get the life you want. That’s being the co-creator.

 

Ready to find out more?

Speaking of more positive action…do you need to make some serious changes in your life so that you are the cause of all the greatness that shows up? Hit the button to schedule your free Orientation Call. Your extraordinary life is waiting.


Extraordinary life waiting…

Does this idea of taking responsibility make you a little afraid? I know it did with me at first. I’d love to help you see how powerful this concept is. Come follow me on Facebook and Instagram, and subscribe to my YouTube channel and I’ll show you that it’s not so scary after all. 

Let’s get messy!!!

I’ve come a long way in five years. 

AND I’m still human.

Life itself is a process, it takes practice to “do” life. And life is usually pretty messy. In fact, sometimes it’s plain fucked up. 

The idea of perfection is nothing but an illusion. Being enough of anything is where the power of living lies. No one is perfect, and everyone is enough.

Let me show you what BEING enough looks like and how it still feels successful. BEING real, real messy is a promise I’m ready to keep, for me, my family, and my clients. 

We can all be messy together.